You've Come a Long Way....

Josh, tonight as I reflect on Father's Day, you know that my heart is heavy missing my Daddy. There is so much I am thinking and feeling about that, but am not quite ready to express it yet. The truth is that I've been dreading this day for quite a few weeks and you know that this week has been less than smooth sailing for me. You continue to amaze me at the grace, gentleness and patience you show me. I planned in my heart and mind several weeks ago that I would like to just spend this day in the bed with as little human interaction as possible. But that would be wrong. One, because my Daddy still deserves to be celebrated even if he is not here with us physically. Two, we still have your Dad to celebrate. And three, and most importantly, I want to celebrate you! You deserve to be celebrated!

You have always excelled at everything you do (well, we'll keep working on the dancing thing :), but I know that fatherhood came early for you. I still believe wholeheartedly that you didn't really get that we were having a baby until Sarah Beth entered the world. And then, it was hours later before you held her. You were scared to death you would break her.

I still remember the day we brought her home from the hospital. It's so true what they say about how your view of the world totally changes. I have never been so aware of other cars on the road. I know that is the slowest you have ever driven. We walked into our perfectly clean, organized home and placed Sarah in the bassinette in our room. Your Uncle Jimmy was there working on the house and he peeked his head in to see us sitting on the bed staring at the bassinette. We must have been quite a sight. I have no doubt that "WE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO DO NOW" was written across both of our foreheads. Life changing doesn't even come close to describing that moment.

Almost three years later Eli made his entrance into the world and you were a pro. You even changed his clothes just a few hours after he was born while I slept. I knew you couldn't wait to put him in clothes that had balls on them. :) I awoke to see you cradling him and it was the sweetest moment of my life.

Kate came into the world with all kinds of drama. I guess she didn't want to bore us since we had already done this twice before. Everything was different with her including her stay in the NICU. You got to see her before I did and made sure I got to see a pic. It became our routine to suit up in the scrubs, wash our hands and spend our visiting time with our precious baby. She had you wrapped around her teeny tiny finger in no time and I loved your tender heart even more as we prayed over Baby Cake and other babies whose fates were unknown while we were there. We were so blessed to bring our little trooper home.

In the last eight years you've gone from being scared to death to hold our baby to doing absolutely everything I do for them (and sometimes more!) I always knew you would be a great Daddy, but I didn't know how much I would enjoy observing your journey. I am so thankful that our babies have a Daddy who models so well the love of the Heavenly Father. Thank you for not only giving me the gift of motherhood, but also for being my partner all the way in the adventure of parenting. I love you and so do our babies!!!!

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!

(You can read a blog I wrote about my Dad here.)