Just Give It Away

I decided when I was in college that I needed to write a musical based on my life. There just always seemed to be the perfect song that would fill the musical backdrop of the story of my life. Of course, in a musical of my life there would definitely be a troupe of dancers dancing out scenes rather than acting them. I can hardly watch High School Musical without a surge of bitterness that I did not attend a high school where everyone wore coordinating outfits and burst into song and dance at basketball games and in the cafeteria. Seriously, was that too much to ask for?

Well, that bitterness is what I am thinking about today. And toys. And George Strait. I don't know, y'all, if you can figure my brain out please let me know. Anyway, I have experienced a lack of motivation this week that should be illegal for a homeschooling mom of 3. At one point I was concerned Josh might call my parents for a conference and tell them "She has lots of potential, she just isn't applying herself." He hasn't, but I woke up today determined that I would find me some motivation. I decided to tackle the playroom. Mercy. I don't know what else to say.

I already have two huge bags full of just garbage to throw out and another bag full of stuff to give away. I noticed a pattern as I began to clean, and that is a lot of baskets and storage containers. You see that is always my plan of attack. When I get serious about cleaning I decide I need to buy lots of containers to store things in. Which would be awesome if my kids would ever catch on to the idea of putting all the Barbie stuff in it's designated box and the cars in their box, and so on and so forth. But they don't. They prefer strategically leaving trails of random toys....well everywhere.

My children seem to have become aware that they just have too. much. stuff. Yesterday, Sarah made 24 (for real) signs to put around our neighborhood that say "Toys for sale." This brings to mind the time that Sarah, Eli and their friend Jacey came up with the idea of selling flowers on the side of the road. Not a bad idea considering we live across the street from the cemetery. However, we do not exactly live in the most population dense place if you know what I am saying. In fact, the kids ended up selling some flowers to one of our church members and they were flowers that he planted!!!!!!!Well, I have been trying to decide if I want to have a yard sale sometime soon. I guess the kids are just giving their super unmotivated mom a little push. However, after about 20 minutes in the playroom sorting and tossing I came to the conclusion that I just want it gone! I don't want to sort it, price it, tote it, advertise it and try to sell it. I just want it gone!

That brings me back to bitterness and George Strait. This morning God got on to me bright and early. I mean didn't even let me get a Diet Coke first. I started thinking about my attitude about some things and how if so and so had to go through this or if so and so had experienced that they would have the same attitude I do. WHEW!! Let me tell you, my Father was not happy about it. He made it known that the little attitude I was sportin' is called bitterness and that it does not belong in a child of His.

Cleaning that playroom I thought about all those storage containers and how I have my own storage containers in my heart. I tuck away hurts, frustrations, and disappointments. I think I've dealt with them until something comes into my life and stirs it all up the same way 3 kids trash a playroom in a matter of minutes. Like the playroom floor my thoughts and actions get cluttered and I can't see through all of the junk that should have been thrown out a long time ago.

George Strait came on the radio today singing "Give It Away". Just give it away. As he says, "There ain't nothin' in this house worth fightin' over". There isn't an ounce of bitterness I'm justified in hanging on to. It is definitely not worth hanging onto. In the same way that my kids can't appreciate the new things they get because they get tossed in with all of the junk, I can't experience the love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness and self-control my Father gives when my heart is too crowded with past hurts and bitterness.

Time to make room. Time to give some toys away. Time to give some hurts to the Healer.