Cocooning

Photo courtesy of Google Images

A few weeks back I was reading the kids a bedtime story, and it has stuck with me since. We were reading the story of Hermie, a caterpillar who feels very ordinary and doesn't understand why he doesn't have pretty spots like the ladybug or a cool "house" like the snail. God reassures Hermie that He is not finished with him yet, and sure enough Hermie eventually becomes a beautiful butterfly.

The part that I keep thinking about is the part when Hermie goes into his cocoon. For the first time I started wondering what that process is like. I read that the cocoon stage can last from 2 weeks to an entire season. And during that time the insect becomes an adult. The cocoon is often camouflaged so it will be safe.

Why on earth am I talking about cocoons? Well, I think I've been in one. I haven't blogged much lately, and I would blame it on being busy or tired, because I have been both. But really, I just haven't known what to blog. I just haven't felt able to write. And that is hard for me because writing is my "thing". It is my therapy, my hobby, my release. 

My friend, Melanie, wrote this blog, I Wear Many Hats and I felt like she was expressing what I have been dealing with. The truth is that I sometimes feel so overwhelmed by the hats that I wear and trying to figure out who the "real" Emily is. I have "Mom Emily", "Wife Emily", "Preacher's Wife Emily", "Wish I Could Be a Better Friend Emily", "Working Emily", and the list goes on. Some days I am serious and discuss politics and deep spiritual issues and some days I sing 80's hits at the top of my lungs and dance around the kitchen. I want to care for orphaned children and minister to young moms and visit with the members of our church. I also want to lay on the couch and watch Hallmark movies. And sometimes it's all so overwhelming to me that I just want to sit in the corner and stare at the wall.

That's where the cocooning comes in. I have felt at times that I am isolating myself or not doing enough of the things I should be doing, but I reached the conclusion that at times, God has to cocoon us. He has to grow us. The cocooning process is an inactive one. The insect has to create it's own cocoon, just like we have to choose to want to let God work on us, but once the cocoon is built, God does the work. In the way that an insect turns into a fully functioning adult during that time, God turns us into mature believers. Sometimes He just needs us to be still and quiet for Him to do that.

I'm cocooning y'all. I don't know how long this process will take for me. Writing this may open up the writing floodgates and I'll be posting everyday. Or, it may not. God has a lot of work to do, but I am positive that the end result will be worth it.  Maybe the next time I see you I will be a butterfly. :)

"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new." 

2 Corinthians 5:17