A while back I wrote about my relationship with Josh and how I felt like I knew he was the one for me because I felt safe with him. I realize that just does not sound romantic at all, but for some reason that is the first thing that comes to me when I think of the first time we "embraced". It was our junior prom and I was on the planning committee and had spent the whole day running like a crazy woman decorating and getting stuff ready. I was exhausted by the time I actually got to the dance. (That would become a theme for me. :) K-Ci and JoJo's "All My Life" started blaring through the speakers and we awkwardly made our way to the dance floor. I had made it known to anyone who would listen that I was not interested in a relationship. Josh and I were at prom strictly as *friends*. But, the music started and tired as I was I found myself laying my head on his chest as we danced. And I felt safe. And while it would be several months before we would officially become more than friends, I knew that there was something there that I had never experienced before.
I was thinking about this because my sister recently took some family pics for us, and two of my favorites are candids of me and Josh. We tried really, really hard to pose "romantically", but I just couldn't get it together. She wanted us to put our noses together and stare into each others eyes lovingly. I got the giggles. She got this.
I showed this picture to the person who has been training me at work. She has never met Josh and knows next to nothing about us. The first thing she said was, "He looks like a protector."
My other favorite is one that we didn't even know she was taking. We thought she was taking a pic of the kids, but she snapped one of us.
This may be my most favorite picture of us ever. Besides the fact that she has awesome editing software that removed my wrinkles :), this picture perfectly symbolizes how our relationship makes me feel. Like I'm wrapped in big arms that take care of me. That care about me. That love me in a way I still haven't quite wrapped my brain around.
The greatest thing I realized looking at this picture is that from the first time those arms wrapped around me, I have felt safe because those arms belong to someone who has wanted nothing but good for me. Even in times when what made me happy was hard for him. Even in times when I gave him every reason to be very angry and wish bad things for me. Even in times when I didn't care enough about myself to want good, he wanted it for me.
I am so blessed to have this person who keeps me safe in his arms. But, I am even more blessed to have a Heavenly Father with even bigger arms. Everlasting arms. A Heavenly Father that genuinely wants good for me and who wraps me in those arms through the not so good times. "If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!" Matthew 7:11.
Just like my earthly relationship with Josh, I haven't done a single thing to earn or deserve the love God shows me. I can't understand or explain why He is so good or why He chooses to be my protector. But, I'm thankful to be able to share that He offers the same love and protection to you.
"The eternal God is your refuge, And underneath are the everlasting arms; He will thrust out the enemy from before you, And will say, ‘Destroy!’" Deuteronomy 33:27
2 comments:
Love! I remember you telling me that Josh wanted to follow you to college and you were worried he would be giving up too much. Now years later look at how happy you are.
The wrinkles that you were talking about your sister erasing has got to be in your clothes because you have none in your skin my dear!
I love strong and happy marriages!!!
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